Since the whole explosion of the #metoo “movement,” this LoveLife Transformation Coach has been hearing from both men and women asking for my take on the subject. Some of the comment’s I’ve heard are, “Uch, these women are ruining dating,” and “I don’t even know how to start a conversation with a woman anymore.” Then there’s,“I’m a feminist who likes to cook for a guy I’m dating. If I support #metoo, does it mean I shouldn’t cook for a guy?” and “What if I like her and want to have sex, do I now have to wait for her to initiate?” To offer some levity and clarity and inject my unapologetic authentic no bullsh*t tone to the topic, I decided to write a comprehensive list showcasing the changes to dating pre-and-post #metoo. Here it goes…
Pre #MeToo: Let’s go out and find some cute boys to make out with.
Post #MeToo: I’m flirting same as before and guys ARE NOT responding… at all! Oh no!
Pre #MeToo: I’m wearing that tight blue dress with the great cleavage. What are you wearing?
Post #MeToo: Amish Chic baby!! Can’t be too sexy, guys think you’re trying to be #metoobait
Pre #MeToo: Dick Pics! Send Nudes!
Post #MeToo: Screenshot of Credit Scores. Selfies with the cat.
Pre #MeToo: Friends with benefits.
Post #MeToo: Friends with contracts.
Pre #MeToo: I always hold the door for the women I date and call her an Uber or pick her up and drive her home. Chivalry isn’t dead.
Post #MeToo: She can just meet me. Chivalry is dead, lunatic,radical, feminists killed it. And… we go half or hell, if she makes more money than I do, she can pay for the date. Cheers to equality!
Pre #MeToo: 2am…Another drink? Shot of Patron? WhoooHoooo!! Cheeeers!!
Post #MeToo: 11:45pm…You look like you can use a water… lemon?
Pre #MeToo: Sexy spontaneous make out sessions in the Uber.
Post #MeToo: A walk to the door, kiss on the cheek. “God, I hope she gets that I really like her.”
Pre #MeToo:A walk to the door and a kiss on my cheek?Either he’s a gentleman, an alien or not that into me.
Post #MeToo: Guys don’t make the first move anymore; how sad. Oh shit! I have to make the first move and actually learn what rejection is. MY GOD…WHAT HAVE WE DONE!!!????
Pre #MeToo: Date two whoohooo!! How exciting!! I hope he makes a move.
Post #MeToo: You’re asking me to DocuSign a waiver before our second date agreeing that it is OK to kiss, make-out, and touch my “vaginal area and breasts?” Geez…how transactional.
Pre #MeToo: 6am, find my panties, get dressed and GTFO! That was fun but he’s not for me. I’ll leave quietly!
Post #MeToo:6am you awaken to the smell of bacon, and find him cooking breakfast for you. “How’d you sleep beautiful.” (He’s so scared of being legally charged for having sex, he’s buttering you up by buttering your toast.)
Pre #MeToo: He’s totally into me. He’s introducing me to his friends. YAY! This is getting serious.
Post #MeToo:His friends are now potential witnesses. They’re questioning me harder than the damn F.B.I.
Pre #MeToo: “Baby pack a bag. I’m taking you away for a romantic weekend.”
Post #MeToo: Well, as soon as you sign off on those legal documents we can travel together.
Pre #MeToo: Becky in the graphics department would be such a great match for my older brother. I’m going to set them up.
Post #MeToo: Can I go to jail for setting up my brother? Best to play it safe and not get involved. Sorry bro! No love for you.
Pre #MeToo: House Party!! BYOB!!
Post #MeToo: House Party!! BYOB!! And by accepting this invitation you understand we cannot be liable for any post party sexual activity wanted or unwanted. Reply YES to confirm.
Pre #MeToo: I want to move to a big city with a big dating pool.
Post #MeToo: Dating? What’s dating? I just ordered my first A.I. girlfriend. She’s arriving tomorrow! Wait until you see the rack on her and that mouth. AMAZON Prime baby!
Pre #MeToo: I want to meet a great girl, settle down and have a family.
Post #MeToo: *MGTOW now THAT’s the movement for me. (*Men Going Their Own Way)
Pre #MeToo: I just saved 30% on my car insurance.
Post #MeToo: I just saved $1000 a month by not dating anymore.
Pre #MeToo: Dating sucks!
Post #MeToo: Dating can ruin your entire life.
Pre #MeToo:The children are our future.
Post #MeToo: Where are all the children? Aren’t people having babies anymore? WHAT HAVE WE DONE??
About Lisa Concepcion:
Lisa Concepcion, Certified Professional Dating & Relationship Transformation Expert and Founder of LoveQuest Coaching™ specializes in helping people transform their love lives within 90 days beginning with self-love, the most important love there is. Through her programs rooted in the Law of Attraction, Lisa quickly empowers people to clearly define the relationship they want then helps them to adopt the mindset necessary to manifest and maximize it. Lisa is a recognized life coach specializing in dating, relationships, self-love, break-ups and divorce with the Institute of Professional Excellence in Coaching, endorsed by the International Coaching Federation. She’s based in Miami Beach and serves as a dating and relationship expert to the masses by conducting sessions remotely via video conference to help people worldwide.